Movies Watched -- The Piano Teacher (2001)

Added on by C. Maoxian.

In French. 125 minute running time so at least 30 minutes too long. This movie was ridiculous … just awful art-house porn. Isabelle Oooo-pair plays a sexually masochistic middle-aged woman who lives with her mother (and sleeps in the same bed!) and likes to smell cum rags in jerkoff booths at the local pornography shop (then it goes downhill from there). Michael Haneke made The White Ribbon, which I loved, but this one was a real clinker. Farr liked it but that’s only because of cleft-chin boy (“Oooo-pair has a knack for playing unusually brainy women harboring erotic perversions”).

Dick Roeper: “… a pretentious and ultimately empty examination of a sick and evil woman.”

Ed Gonzalez writes: “In essence, Haneke rapes while Huppert stoically resists,“ which is pretty clever.

That’s her look while she jerks you off


Movies Watched -- Saint Jack (1979)

Added on by C. Maoxian.

112 minute running so 20 minutes too long … movie adaptation of the Paul Theroux novel of the same name, Ben Gazzara plays a pimp in early 1970s Singapore … trouble is the DVD had poor quality audio and no subtitles, so it was tough to understand the story … interesting to see Singapore in the late 1970s though, still pretty backward … sex, homosexual sex, interracial sex, all topics the sex-obsessed Paul Theroux is into … I don’t think I would have been too thrilled with the movie if I could have understood it, though I do like Ben Gazzara, he’s an actor who took chances.

I have no time for him. He work all day, I work all night.

Author Recommendations Circle Jerk

Added on by C. Maoxian.

I borrowed a John Lescroart book from the library only to find that it was crap. According to the cover, he is a New York Times Bestselling Author. On the back were five glowing blurbs for John Lescroart from fellow bestselling authors. It’s safe to assume that not only is John Lescroart a crap writer, but so are C.J. Box, Karin Slaughter, Catherine Coulter, Gayle Lynds, and Robert Dugoni … all crap writers supporting one another in one big circle jerk.

Movies Watched -- Parallel Mothers (2021)

Added on by C. Maoxian.

In Spanish. 123 minute running time so at least 23 minutes too long … pretty mild and mainstream for an Almodovar movie … Penelope Cruz still looks good for an old lady … beautiful people, beautifully dressed, beautiful apartments, no money problems … all this was nice, but it was kind of boring too. Fascist mass grave angle sort of interesting, but felt tacked on. Massive product placements from both Apple and Suzuki Motors. You can give it a miss.

She’s going to be dark like you.

Movies Watched -- Synonyms (2019)

Added on by C. Maoxian.

In French. 123 minute running time so at least 30 minutes too long. This was a movie about a young Israeli man named Yoav and his big, thick cock. His big, thick cock is prominently featured throughout the movie because this was a French movie. Yoav is in Paris and he has abandoned Israel and swears never to go back. This was a weird movie and may have had some humor in the vein of Lanthimos, but I didn’t get it. I can’t recommend this and have no idea how it ended up in my queue, maybe Farr is to blame? No, he isn’t.

Jonathan Romney correctly writes: “"Synonyms can’t be faulted on individuality or indeed rage, but many viewers are likely to find it abrasive, grating, infuriating and other synonyms besides.”

Big, thick cock briefly under wraps (yes, a pun)